Dear lady manners: My wife and I visited a friend and her new partner for the weekend. His partner took us to an excursion about 20 miles away and went to 95 mph on the road.
Despite fear of our lives, we said nothing. On the way back, however, I asked the partner politely if I could keep his speed below 80 mph.
He immediately became outraged, left the car and tolerated me, I must drive and that would sit on the back with my wife. I told him that I would not drive and only obey the speed limits.
After a heated exchange, he returned coldly to the car, led more slowly and never said another word for the rest of the trip. It was very uncomfortable. Was he right to talk?
Soft reader: If a reasonable person’s shoulder feels that the alternative to speak would have a leg next to the road when the Local Police made their rounds on Monday morning, then this is not a tag question.
The tag question is: What to do after everyone returned in the car?
Miss Manners’s response is: play silly. After enough time has passed to allow everyone to recover their course, they resume a normal interaction with their friend as you can gather, talk about other things for the rest of the weekend.
He won the fool of anyone, but you have to spend time somehow, you are not likely to accept a second invitation, and it is better than playing dead.
Dear lady manners: I have received several invitations to large planned events through group text.
Either for a retirement party, wedding shower or anniversary celebration, each message included the image of an invitation, with the standard design and presentation. This indicated a certain amount of bomb and circumstance and caused an answer.
I really appreciate this new standard, since I find that it is more likely to immediately consult my calendar and issue a timely response that with the invitations sent by mail. I also like to see the rest of the guest list.
However, without an envelope or other specification of the recipients, it is not clear which members of my home are included in the invitation. I do not want to seem that I am trying to invite my children to an event that is not destined to them, but having to organize child care is a determining factor for whether we attribute.
Is there an educated way to ask for clarifications on this point?
Soft reader: Send a separate text message to the host asking if children are included in the invitation. Keep in mind the writing: it is not an exception for their children, but if the event includes children in general.
Once you have an answer to the Gothic, thank the host for the invitation and say that you will verify the calendars and respond quickly. Miss Manners knows that his response to the event depends on whether the children were invited, but there is no reason for the host to know that.
Send your questions to Miss Manners on the website, www.missmanners.com; To your email, gentleraader@msmanners.com; Or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndionction, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
